EVIL

On facebook chat:
Me:Oh no, My set for Last Comic Standing is pure evil...
Janette Casolary: What kind of evil?
Me: Female sexuality evil...

Oops!
Sorry Pope Benedict!


Also, could you look any more like the Empirer in the Empire Strikes Back? Yikes.

Time turns into color...

SO, this is my favorite thing right now. I had a little too much Robitussin the other night and I stared at that website and laughed for at least an hour and shared it with whoever happened to be on facebook at 3am.
Oh goodness, well... my life is going normally. Home for Thanksgiving. Writing comedy. The theme to my comedy is mostly death right now and that probably has something to do with the weather being absolutely apocalyptic right now. Yikes. Miserable. Hate it. The worst part of the snow and the holiday season in general is how cute couples get. Playing in the snow. Cuddling by fires. Disgusting. A couple was behind me in a long Starbucks line yesterday, baby talking, kissing, snuggling. I was like, "EXCUSE ME, some of us ARE LONELY!!! So unless you want to let me join you, I suggest you stop. But really, can I join you? Please."

I've had more stage time than usual in the past couple weeks, which is great because WWU's Last Comic Standing is in a week! I'm excited because I think that since we first had this event three years ago, a lot of us Western comedians have developed a lot. Anyway, I hope it's a good show.

So...I had an interesting experience last week where a friend of mine did a joke on stage that offended a couple girls in the front row. The joke was not a rape joke necessarily but it had rapey undertones. It was a "lack of consent" joke. A girl whispered under her breath "that's not funny" and this really upset him. I feel a little weird talking about this on my blog because I do have respect for him, but I found this to be a tricky and loaded scenario. I did my best to comfort him, because he was upset, but I also understood where these girls were coming from. I have written about these issues here and here. I get a little sick of writing about these things. In my opinion, his jokes weren't totally offensive but they were bordering on upsetting for me. I really respect him and comics like him who dedicate themselves to writing and performing jokes to make people laugh. However, when they get sooooo defensive and angry at people they upset, I feel bad for them but not as bad as I feel for the people they upset. Especially when those people are upset because they feel like jokes are condoning or encouraging rape culture (or other social/institutionalized oppressions). I would choose being the person who has to deal with telling an offensive rape joke over being the woman who has been raped and is triggered by the joke's content. I honestly feel that some comedians, especially white males, just absolutely do not understand why they are hurting people. It's really weird. I just want to tell them there's this invisible thing they can't see. It's called oppression and you aren't breaking it down, you're perpetuating it. If you understood it better maybe you could be smarter with some of your jokes and actually do some cool subversive and progressive shit with it. So, read a book.

It's sad in a way because society socialized them to be a certain way and then they're punished for it in ways they don't understand. Unfortunately their defensiveness or unwillingness to hear about it can be even more hurtful and oppressive.

FUUUUUCCK, I don't really want to be this person that has to talk about this shit. This is going to be a problem for me in navigating the world of comedy, I think.Sometimes I don't want to be "that girl." However, it's who I am. It's my world view. And it's right... so there. It is a bit of a burden to have views that differ from the mainstream. It is a never ending battle. It's annoying. That's why you have to fucking have a sense of humor about it.
But damn this shit is complicated.

In regards to comedians or others confronting people about their privilege in tactful ways (not that you have to, do what you want) this video by Jay Smooth is quite excellent. Replace the word race or racist with rape or rapist as need be.

In somewhat related news, this article spotlights an anti rape campaign in Canada called "Don't be that guy." It's aimed at preventing sexual assault. It has slogans like "Just because you helped her home, doesn't mean you get to help yourself." I love it. I'd love to do something similar in Bellingham/ Seattle this year. I'd love to have similar campaigns with creative and comical ways of shaking up society. Let's be real, it could use some shaking up.

On taking offense...

Last night I went to a comedy show that left me more depressed than before I went to it. This is certainly not what comedy should do.
The first half was pretty good. It was funny. Offensive jokes here and there but I could stomach them because overall, the comics were funny.
However somewhere along the lines the show became only about "midget jokes" accompanied with the occasional rape joke. It was honestly really embarrassing. However the rest of the crowd loved it. In fact they were encouraging it. There's something disturbing about seeing people just crack up at jokes that hurt you.
The explanation if you take offense is always, "It's a joke, it's just a joke." Or, "It's comedy." I understand, there is something to be said about laughing at jokes you're not supposed to or taking a taboo subject and laughing at it. Okay, I get that. Everybody does that. But where do you draw the line? I don't know, but sometimes I'll see someone, like maybe a white man, say something really fucking racist or sexist or homophobic or ableist in way that is just blatantly hurtful, unoriginal and unfunny and I just want to ask them if it makes them feel powerful. There's a lot of selfishness, entitlement, ignorance and privilege that makes people feel like they can and should put other people down. They're pushing other people down to raise themselves up. That's how privilege and oppression works.
There is no such thing as "it's just a joke." Words have meaning. They can have devastating effects.
Take for example the LGBT teen suicides that have been happening for a while but are getting a ton of attention lately (finally). This video discusses some different kinds of oppression that LGBT peoples face which contribute to the suicides. Around 1:26, Gene Fucking Simmons says, "Bullying isn't always about fists. It often starts with a joke." Jokes can be used to put people down, to hurt people, to scare people, etc... They can be devastating.
Laughter can be healing but it can also be cruel.
Once I was at the Horseshoe (local dive bar) with Paul Beatty (NO BIG DEAL) and we were talking about taking offense to humor. He said that he was chatting with Sarah Silverman's Rabbi sister who said she doesn't think it's legitimate to say you're offended. You're not offended. You're sad or angry or hurt or scared or upset or deflated, etc... (Here is an interesting interview he did that touches on similar issues.) I think Sarah Silverman's Rabbi sister is right. In that same respect comedians should note that people don't get offended just to get offended. There's usually something else going on that should be taken into account.
Comedians are always going to offend someone. But it matters how they offend them.
I offend people all the time. Especially when I'm talking about my sexuality. This is me expressing my experience and liberating myself. I'm not putting down already vulnerable groups. Quite the opposite. I'm resisting the silencing suppression of my Queer female sexuality by a patriarchal rape culture that would like me to stay trapped in a web of fear and shame.
In the recent documentary on Joan Rivers, she gets heckled by an audience member after a Helen Keller joke. The man yells out, "That's not funny. My son is deaf." She calls him a moron and says "It's comedy." However after her show she seems sympathetic towards him. I found it interesting to see how she dealt with this. Yeah, it's hard not to offend people. Often comedians will have some offensive material but are generally funny and smart and kind. I respect them.
I do not respect people who take the stage to unabashedly target a marginalized group of people like little people. It was really bad last night. The friend I went with was doing a lot of heckling. I might have stopped her because I know how hard comedy can be and I want to respect the comedians but fuuuuuuck. These guys were like the creepiest assholes. Also my favorite part of the whole show was when one comeian said, "Why would I be afraid of midgets? What are they gonna do?" and my friend yelled out "They'll light you on fire!"
Okay well. Thanks for humoring my female hysteria once again. Yikes.
Here is a pretty good article that talks about contemporary humor and ableism that is relevant to the issues mentioned above.
You know, I think I'm pretty good at giving comics the benefit of the doubt and I give them as much respect as I can. However sometimes, I'm just want comedy to fucking step it up and reach its potential of being fun and awesome and not shitty and fucked up. Sometimes shit is not okay, and people have every right to be offended.
This offensive show last night made me feel like I can't yet I have to do comedy.
I have to go to bed now.

Process

Hello. It's midnight. I'm a little lonely but probably fine. Wanting to get over a cough that I have had FOREVER and am almost certain is being caused by poison in the walls. I just tried to write a smart post regarding gendered humor, language and atmosphere in stand up comedy but don't have it in me tonight. Maybe tomorrow though. So look out for that. It's going to be a brilliant and enlightening experience for you. Fucking Plato coming out of caves. Seeing light and shit.

I have been obsessed with comedy lately. I've been writing constantly and when I'm not thinking about sex or sexism, I'm thinking about comedy projects. It is a little much. Perhaps it's good just to have a real creative outlet to persue. There's something about stand up that is just the lamest/ coolest thing to me. It is the incredible combo of lame and cool that draws me. I listened to an interview with Jon Stewart and he was talking about his stand up process. He said that somewhere along the lines he realized how good he was and how bad he was. There's something very comforting and very human about that. As I'm doing comedy regularly I'm really learning how good I am and how bad I am. It's empowering and humbling. I'm loving the process. I'm growing as a comic and as a human. And shit do I love making people laugh.

I performed at the Underground Coffee House this week and it was a great experience all around. Although I spent the time before hacking up phlem in the bathroom and trying not to pass out, once I got on stage I forgot I was sick. Sometimes I just have to force myself to go onstage and hopefully I can work through some shit and get off the stage feeling better than before. You could say... it's healing to express yourself.

Here's an article that our campus paper put out yesterday about the show.


I'm hoping there's gonna be more stand up around Bellingham and at Western this year.